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BassMaster Classic 2011 Will Be Off the Scales

Filed under: Contests,Events,National,Sports — Tags: , , , , — Positronic Dave @ 5:33 pm February 18, 2011

Set against the dulcet sounds of the retreating glaciers, looms the grandeur that will be the BassMaster Classic 2011. Ok, the glaciers are really just there for the effect. As cold as it can get in Louisiana in the winter, it’s not that cold. But I didn’t make up the BassMaster Classic 2011. That is for reel, baby.


The three-day fish-a-thon is not for those whose rods run to the thin side. The 50 or so top-ranked freshwater fisherman are angling (I’m sorry, I can’t stop myself) for a prize purse of $500,000 dollars, not to mention lucrative endorsement deals and the respect of fry-cooks everywhere. Set to run for three days, from tomorrow through Sunday, the boats all leave from Bayou Segnette State Park and thence unto the quest for the glory of the biggest bass caught and/or the highest weight for a catch of three fish.

Those 50 select fisherman I mentioned before all got here by winning other, smaller competitions, in order to rank for the invite here. So we have the best of the best, with all their fish-catching experience. As far as fish competitions go, this one is the big one you don’t want to let get away.

I’m sure there are regulations regarding the fishing equipment one uses, which is sad really. I expect that while it’s a lucrative feeding ground for the makers of high-end composite-carbon rods and laser-sighted fishing lures with GPS link-up, it must certainly exclude a number of innovative approaches to the sport.

Like depth charges. You could have this sucker over and people kicking back with cold beers in less than a minute if theses were on the certified list. Or Bull sharks. They’re good in fresh and salt water, can fish-smack a bass just by swimming near it. Plus, they look awesome when stored in racks at the back of the boats. I implore the National Fisherman’s Guild, or whatever they call themselves to at least consider these ideas. Please… for the children.

And sometime over the weekend, if you’ve a moment to spare, think on fan-favorite Gary “Sentimental Favorite” Klein, who has never won the event in the 29 years he has competed, but still he comes back every year, fresh and ready to win. You can’t fake that kind of “can’t-do-but-still-acts-like he-can” optimism. Who knows, this could be Gary’s year. Lord of the Fisherman knows, it’s not going to be easy this year. Many of the competitors had to drag their boats (well tow, really, you don’t want to drag a boat… bad for the keel) through snow and sleet and

Sonya Thomas: 105 Lbs. of Eating Fury

Filed under: Contests,Food!,Hot & Sexy — Tags: , , — Positronic Dave @ 2:41 pm September 6, 2010

Sonya Thomas

Sonya Thomas, who is barely 5 feet tall, and weighs in 1/3 of a Rush Limbaugh, won the Buffalo Wing Eating Contest, held at the 9th Annual National Buffalo Wing Festival, held in…. wait for it… Buffalo, New York.

The fiery (even before the ingestion of several ounces of hot sauce) competitor downed an unbelievable 181 wings in 12 minutes. That equals nearly 5 lbs of chicken meat, or 5% of her total body weight, in one sitting. Her closest rival (who was over a foot taller and over twice her weight) came in at 169 wings, making her win even more amazing, if gross examples of competitive over-eating happen to be your thing. If you’re more of the “I’ll eat a few, but I’m not gorging here” kind of person, not to worry